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Part 2: Personality assessment:
The following is a list of 100 statements, these are phrases describing people's behaviors. Please use the rating scale to describe how accurately each statement describes you. Describe yourself as you generally are now, not as you wish to be in the future. Describe yourself as you honestly see yourself, in relation to other people you know of the same sex as you are, and roughly your same age. Please read each statement carefully, and then fill in the bubble that corresponds to the number on the scale.
Rating Scale:
1: Very Inaccurate
2: Moderately Inaccurate
3: Neither Inaccurate nor Accurate
4: Moderately Accurate
5: Very Accurate
Am the life of the party.
1
2
3
4
5
Insult people.
1
2
3
4
5
Am always prepared.
1
2
3
4
5
Get stressed out easily.
1
2
3
4
5
Have a rich vocabulary.
1
2
3
4
5
Often feel uncomfortable around others.
1
2
3
4
5
Am interested in people.
1
2
3
4
5
Leave my belongings around.
1
2
3
4
5
Am relaxed most of the time.
1
2
3
4
5
Have difficulty understanding abstract ideas.
1
2
3
4
5
Feel comfortable around people.
1
2
3
4
5
Am not interested in other people's problems.
1
2
3
4
5
Pay attention to details.
1
2
3
4
5
Worry about things.
1
2
3
4
5
Have a vivid imagination.
1
2
3
4
5
Keep in the background.
1
2
3
4
5
Sympathize with others' feelings.
1
2
3
4
5
Make a mess of things.
1
2
3
4
5
Seldom feel blue.
1
2
3
4
5
Am not interested in abstract ideas.
1
2
3
4
5
Start conversations.
1
2
3
4
5
Feel little concern for others.
1
2
3
4
5
Get chores done right away.
1
2
3
4
5
Am easily disturbed.
1
2
3
4
5
Have excellent ideas.
1
2
3
4
5
Have little to say.
1
2
3
4
5
Have a soft heart.
1
2
3
4
5
Often forget to put things back in their proper place.
1
2
3
4
5
Am not easily bothered by things.
1
2
3
4
5
Do not have a good imagination.
1
2
3
4
5
Talk to a lot of different people at parties.
1
2
3
4
5
Am not really interested in others.
1
2
3
4
5
Like order.
1
2
3
4
5
Get upset easily.
1
2
3
4
5
Am quick to understand things.
1
2
3
4
5
Don't like to draw attention to myself.
1
2
3
4
5
Take time out for others.
1
2
3
4
5
Shirk my duties.
1
2
3
4
5
Rarely get irritated.
1
2
3
4
5
Try to avoid complex people.
1
2
3
4
5
Don't mind being the center of attention.
1
2
3
4
5
Am hard to get to know.
1
2
3
4
5
Follow a schedule.
1
2
3
4
5
Change my mood a lot.
1
2
3
4
5
Use difficult words.
1
2
3
4
5
Am quiet around strangers.
1
2
3
4
5
Feel others' emotions.
1
2
3
4
5
Neglect my duties.
1
2
3
4
5
Seldom get mad.
1
2
3
4
5
Have difficulty imagining things.
1
2
3
4
5
Make friends easily.
1
2
3
4
5
Am indifferent to the feelings of others.
1
2
3
4
5
Am exacting in my work.
1
2
3
4
5
Have frequent mood swings.
1
2
3
4
5
Spend time reflecting on things.
1
2
3
4
5
Find it difficult to approach others.
1
2
3
4
5
Make people feel at ease.
1
2
3
4
5
Waste my time.
1
2
3
4
5
Get irritated easily.
1
2
3
4
5
Avoid difficult reading material.
1
2
3
4
5
Take charge.
1
2
3
4
5
Inquire about others' well-being.
1
2
3
4
5
Do things according to a plan.
1
2
3
4
5
Often feel blue.
1
2
3
4
5
Am full of ideas.
1
2
3
4
5
Don't talk a lot.
1
2
3
4
5
Know how to comfort others.
1
2
3
4
5
Do things in a half-way manner.
1
2
3
4
5
Get angry easily.
1
2
3
4
5
Will not probe deeply into a subject.
1
2
3
4
5
Know how to captivate people.
1
2
3
4
5
Love children.
1
2
3
4
5
Continue until everything is perfect.
1
2
3
4
5
Panic easily.
1
2
3
4
5
Carry the conversation to a higher level.
1
2
3
4
5
Bottle up my feelings.
1
2
3
4
5
Am on good terms with nearly everyone.
1
2
3
4
5
Find it difficult to get down to work.
1
2
3
4
5
Feel threatened easily.
1
2
3
4
5
Catch on to things quickly.
1
2
3
4
5
Feel at ease with people.
1
2
3
4
5
Have a good word for everyone.
1
2
3
4
5
Make plans and stick to them.
1
2
3
4
5
Get overwhelmed by emotions.
1
2
3
4
5
Can handle a lot of information.
1
2
3
4
5
Am a very private person.
1
2
3
4
5
Show my gratitude.
1
2
3
4
5
Leave a mess in my room.
1
2
3
4
5
Take offense easily.
1
2
3
4
5
Am good at many things.
1
2
3
4
5
Wait for others to lead the way.
1
2
3
4
5
Think of others first.
1
2
3
4
5
Love order and regularity.
1
2
3
4
5
Get caught up in my problems.
1
2
3
4
5
Love to read challenging material.
1
2
3
4
5
Am skilled in handling social situations.
1
2
3
4
5
Love to help others.
1
2
3
4
5
Like to tidy up.
1
2
3
4
5
Grumble about things.
1
2
3
4
5
Love to think up new ways of doing things.
1
2
3
4
5
Part 3: Humor Preference Assessmnt:
The following is a list of 96 jokes, please score your personal preference in scale of how funny you find them, even if you have heard the joke before. Please read each joke carefully, and then fill in the bubble that corresponds to the number on the rating scale.
Rating Scale:
1: Not Funny
2: Slightly Amuzing
3: Almost Funny
4: Funny
5: Very Funny
Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.
1
2
3
4
5
Why did God create man before woman? He didn't want any advice.
1
2
3
4
5
Go the extra mile; it makes your boss look like an incompetent slacker.
1
2
3
4
5
A dwarf wanted to commit suicide so he jumped off the curb.
1
2
3
4
5
If you tell the truth you don't have to remember anything.
1
2
3
4
5
Diplomacy is the art of telling someone to go to hell in such a way that he looks forward to the trip.
1
2
3
4
5
A child's wisdom: Never try to baptize a cat.
1
2
3
4
5
A child's wisdom: Remember you're never too old to hold your father's hand.
1
2
3
4
5
Some days you are the bug other days you are the windscreen.
1
2
3
4
5
The policeman said: The answer to this will determine whether you are drunk: Was Micky Mouse a cat or a dog?
1
2
3
4
5
Puppies still have bad breath even after eating a tic tac.
1
2
3
4
5
I love defenseless animals especially in good gravy.
1
2
3
4
5
Smile, it makes people wonder what you're up to.
1
2
3
4
5
Support bacteria; they are the only culture some people have.
1
2
3
4
5
Every morning is the dawn of a new error.
1
2
3
4
5
UFO's are real; it is the Air Force that doesn't exist.
1
2
3
4
5
Better the devil you know.
1
2
3
4
5
Sign at the office of a Roman doctor: Specialist in women and other diseases.
1
2
3
4
5
If he asks what sort of books you're interested in tell him checkbooks.
1
2
3
4
5
Three miser friends went swimming they betted whoever dives the least pays for supper; they all ended up dead.
1
2
3
4
5
I don't suffer from stress; I am a carrier.
1
2
3
4
5
He who laughs last doesn't get the joke.
1
2
3
4
5
Regular naps prevent aging especially when you take them while driving.
1
2
3
4
5
I don't approve of political jokes: I see too many get elected.
1
2
3
4
5
My opinions may have changed but not the fact that I'm right.
1
2
3
4
5
A thief went to rob a house couldn't find anything so he called long distance and left the receiver off the hook.
1
2
3
4
5
It's better to let someone think you are an idiot than to open your mouth and prove it.
1
2
3
4
5
The voice of a 3-year old is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.
1
2
3
4
5
An idiot was painting the ceiling his mother said put a newspaper under your feet; he said I don't need it I can reach.
1
2
3
4
5
A person who smiles in the face of adversity probably has a scapegoat.
1
2
3
4
5
Closed mouth gathers no foot.
1
2
3
4
5
George W. Bush's new strategy: A timetable for the withdrawal of all Iraqis from Iraq.
1
2
3
4
5
A child's wisdom: Listen to your brain it has a lot of information.
1
2
3
4
5
Someone asked a stoned person: What's the quickest way to the hospital? He said close your eyes and cross the street.
1
2
3
4
5
A child's wisdom: Never do pranks at a police station.
1
2
3
4
5
I hear you changed your mind! What did you do with the diaper?
1
2
3
4
5
Sign in a Copenhagen airline ticket office: We take your bags and send them in all directions.
1
2
3
4
5
Sign on the door of a Moscow hotel room: If this is your first visit to the USSR, you are welcome to it.
1
2
3
4
5
Any day above ground is a good one.
1
2
3
4
5
Your potential? Leave it alone It is like your bank balance; You have less of it than what you think.
1
2
3
4
5
A fair face may fade, but a beautiful soul last forever.
1
2
3
4
5
The envious praise me unknowingly.
1
2
3
4
5
Better a diamond with a flaw than a pebble without.
1
2
3
4
5
Some people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them.
1
2
3
4
5
Better to understand a little than to misunderstand a lot.
1
2
3
4
5
Sign in Turkey: The government bans the smoking of children.
1
2
3
4
5
A father is someone who carries pictures where his money used to be.
1
2
3
4
5
God doesn't discriminate ... only religions do.
1
2
3
4
5
Success is the ability to go from one failure to another without losing enthusiasm.
1
2
3
4
5
Some drink at the fountain of knowledge. Others just gargle.
1
2
3
4
5
When asked about her boyfriend's occupation she said: He's not technically a lawyer but he's got three court cases next week.
1
2
3
4
5
Men are like bank accounts. Without a lot of money, they don't generate much interest.
1
2
3
4
5
An eye for an eye leaves the whole world blind.
1
2
3
4
5
German hotel: All the water has been passed by the manager.
1
2
3
4
5
I come from a stupid family. My father worked in a bank. They caught him stealing pens.
1
2
3
4
5
When the president of Egypt heard of the billions promised for the reconstruction of Gaza he invited the Israelis to bomb Cairo.
1
2
3
4
5
He who doesn't hope to win has already lost.
1
2
3
4
5
A wise man learns at a fool's expense.
1
2
3
4
5
God heals, the Doctor takes the Fee.
1
2
3
4
5
Are you always an idiot, or just when I'm around?
1
2
3
4
5
A friend is someone who has the same enemies you have.
1
2
3
4
5
Sign in a church: For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.
1
2
3
4
5
The only time the world beats a path to your door is if you're in the bathroom.
1
2
3
4
5
A conservative is a politician who wants to keep what the liberals fought for a generation ago.
1
2
3
4
5
The road to a friend's house is never long.
1
2
3
4
5
A celebrity is someone who works hard all his life to become known and then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized.
1
2
3
4
5
One's own simple bread is much better than someone else's pilaf.
1
2
3
4
5
A blind man suddenly regained his sight, he got paralyzed from the joy.
1
2
3
4
5
The average person thinks he isn't.
1
2
3
4
5
Sign in a Swiss nuns hospital: The nuns harbor all diseases and have no respect for religion.
1
2
3
4
5
I went to a freak show and they let me in for nothing.
1
2
3
4
5
George Bush... great president, or the greatest president?
1
2
3
4
5
I don't want the cheese, I just want to get out of the trap.
1
2
3
4
5
If you can't dance don't blame the dance floor.
1
2
3
4
5
A woman confused her Valium with birth control pills, now she has 10 kids and doesn't care.
1
2
3
4
5
Your armpits smell so bad that the teacher gave you an A just for not raising your hand.
1
2
3
4
5
A problem well stated is a problem half solved.
1
2
3
4
5
Sign in a Bucharest hotel: The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable.
1
2
3
4
5
I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me, he said I was being ridiculous everyone hasn't met me yet.
1
2
3
4
5
Sometimes it takes a crazy person to tell the truth. If so, I'm a freaking lunatic.
1
2
3
4
5
Keep quiet and people will think you a philosopher.
1
2
3
4
5
Never ask a barber if he thinks you need a haircut.
1
2
3
4
5
If you want a committed man look in a mental hospital.
1
2
3
4
5
Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
1
2
3
4
5
Hell is paved with good Samaritans.
1
2
3
4
5
In a Zurich hotel: Because of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom, it is suggested that the lobby be used for this purpose.
1
2
3
4
5
A friend sent me a post card with a picture of planet Earth taken from space. On the back it said: Wish you were here.
1
2
3
4
5
Many people believe that the best government is the one that governs the least, by that standard the US set a fabulous one in Iraq.
1
2
3
4
5
The sooner you fall behind the more time you'll have to catch up.
1
2
3
4
5
I don't trust books; they're all fact, no heart.
1
2
3
4
5
Don't imagine you can change a man unless he's in diapers.
1
2
3
4
5
If you were twice as smart as you are now, you'd be absolutely stupid.
1
2
3
4
5
The devil can cite scriptures for his own purpose.
1
2
3
4
5
In Amsterdam airport urinals have image of a fly to aim at in the middle..in order to reduce spillage.
1
2
3
4
5
I drink too much. The last time I gave a urine sample it had an olive in it.
1
2
3
4
5
Just because the Pope is infallible doesn't mean he can't make mistakes.
1
2
3
4
5
Do you consider your political views in general liberal or conservative?
Liberal
Conservative
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Do you permit passing contact information in order to conduct humor preference surveys for academic reasons?
Yes
No
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Do you permit passing contact information in order to conduct humor preference surveys for commercial reasons?
Yes
No
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